The Toilet Paper Absurdity

Okay, so I am cranky now. This afternoon I went to do the usual fortnightly grocery shop, and the doomsday preppers had gone nuts and reduced quantities in a few areas - long life milk, hand cleaners of various sorts, rice and cheaper brands of paracetamol and Iboprofen. Annoying, but a kinda understandable. Then I went to get toilet paper. Nothing. Not a single damned sheet. I am reliably informed that what I experienced in terms of cleaned out toilet paper shelves has been repeated in most supermarkets across the city, the state and even the country!


Now, in general I don't think Australians should be freaking out about corona-virus - yes it is highly contagious, yes it can kill you, and yes nearly a hundred thousand people around the world have contracted it. But at the same time, the number of recorded deaths is in the hundreds - not specially worse (okay its so far) than the swine flu or whatever. And surely the panic is going to make a difficult situation much much worse? But, despite all of that, what the hell is the deal with toilet paper? If in the unfortunate circumstance of having to be in lock down for any length of time, surely it is more important to have food available for the duration. Unless, of course, you are planning to supplement your diet with a few sheets of loo paper at every meal. I just want to point out that the world has not always had toilet paper, and in some countries, they still don't. So clearly it is possible to survive without it.

So can I request that everyone just take a deep breath and (in the immortal words of Tay Tay) calm the heck down? I have probably got a week or so before I run out of toilet paper completely and I don't want to have to chase all over the place to get the last remaining pack when I do. So if you are one of the nutcases who now has a year's worth of the stuff in the cupboard, for heavens sake, take some back, or give some to friends or something. Don't buy any more and don't you DARE waste any of it.

© 2020 by Ann Russell. 

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Ann Russell, Cashmere, Qld, Australia | ann@annrussellart.com | 0438410145